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I struggled to access joy for a long time because of my BPD; I even believed I was incapable of feeling joy. What keeps you afloat when you are drowning, that is where joy is. When my entire world was dark, the color that I found was on the paper sitting before me. I call them the little pieces of my soul on paper, because that is where I found myself and that is where I stored my chaos. I threw myself into my art and it was like I blinked and accumulated 15+ pieces of artwork in less than six months. And I realized, in hindsight, those little pieces of my soul were the little reasons I survived. BPD was what I was suffering from so deeply, and creativity was what kept me alive and kept me from losing my battle to this relentless disorder. I like to say, my illness is relentless, but so am I.

To be able to share the thing that sparked joy when nothing else did is such a gift. A full circle moment that I am beyond grateful for. Here is some of my joy. I hope if anything at all, it makes someone feel less alone. 

Thank you for landing here.




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